05 Nov Hidden In The Fog #2

Today I want to talk about all of the other people who are hidden in the fog, about us, the foreigners that are here for a semester or more.

What is the real purpose of us coming? Sometimes peoples’ answer is this: “I came to perfect my English!”  This may be true for them, but for me, and I am not alone, there is something else, there is something bigger, there is something felt in our guts, something that is deeply embedded in us. We came here to take a punch in the face. We want to demolish a life that we once had but no longer want.  We want to prove that there is another way to live.  There is a life that can be imagined by the individual, not programmed by the masses.  There is not a formula that will make you either a good boy or a good girl; this is merely a social construct.  And if our mind can be opened enough, and if it is true that nothing is inherently good or bad since thoughts are what make things reality, then the more we can expand ourselves, the more that we can see, the more diverse our perspectives can become, the truer our life will be.

So we decided to leave, move far away to a place where nobody would know us, to a place we knew nothing about.  San Francisco is a city that everybody raves about, builds stereotypes on top of, but not everyone has a chance to find the heart of the bay, to experience what it is like to actually live here.  Finally after the many stacks of paperwork, we left our homes and were off. This takeoff was not as simple as just a mere plane lifting off the ground, it was emotional, it was symbolic, it represents change.  You are happy because you have reaped what you have fought so hard for and what you have always wanted.  You feel the exhilaration of freedom, but at the very same time, you feel amazing heartache, to watch all of the people you love’s faces recede, and you have to kiss them goodbye for who knows how long.  Then you are off in the plane for what seems like an eternity. San Francisco eventually appears.  You leave the plane, you take the BART into town, you exit the station, and you feel an overwhelming sense of emptiness and anonymity.  You have no clear footing, everything is new, and what you once knew so well, is so far away, and this feeling of vulnerability you succumb to, and you let the city adopt you.  There is something about San Francisco that makes you think that it is the place you belong.  You are lost, but you think that here nothing can happen to you, and in a strange way, you don’t feel alone because everyone seems a little lost here.  But this is the best feeling, it is the feeling of infinite possibilities.  Then you realize that you are exactly where you should be, and you are free to be creative and draw your whole life anew.

Nobody can understand that feeling unless they experience it firsthand.  For all of the reasons mentioned above, I am so happy to meet all of the people at the IEEC to share in this.

https://soundcloud.com/axelthesleff/bad-karma